Funny SMS Messages - Do u kno which

THE NEWS

14 Aug 2020

Headline News

PM BILAWAL meet Presidnt ZARDARI

President ZARDARI visit neighbour country BALOCHISTAN

PAK loses Cricket series against CANADA

IMRAN khan is the leader of TALIBAN

MEERA 25th BIRTHDAY 2day

9th SEPTEMBER on death anivrsary of CHOUDHRY BROTHERS

OSAMA still WANTED

SHOAIB AKHTER hopeful 2 play in nxt MATCH

1$=420Rs

Petrol 1 ltr=1450Rs

CNG=3020Rs/kg

Gold=2000000/10g

AATA stolen frm LHR Museum

Sugar 1100/kg =P ;)

Funny SMS Messages - Taste this SMS

# Gul Khan Ne Job K liye Apply kia..

Jawab aaya to khushi mein 1 Grand Party de dali.

Dost ne farmayesh ki k appointment letter dikhao.

Gul Khan: Ye English main hai, main tarjuma karta hun,

"Dear Gul khan you do not meet"

pyary gul khan ap to milty hi nahi

"our requirements"

hamari zaroorat ho ap

"no further correspondence"

or zidd na karain jaldi ajayen

"will be entertained"

Aap ki bohot khidmat ki jaye gi.

Funny SMS Messages - in HOSPITAL

Kid- Teacher, Can I Go

To Bathroom ?

Teacher- Yes, But

Only After Reciting The

Alphabates !

Kid- Ok !

"A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,

M,N,O,

Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y,Z !"

Teacher- Where Is "P" ?

Kid- Its Running

Down My Leg !!


Plz Let Me Go To The

Bathroom ... ;->

Funny SMS Messages - MOTOROLA K Add Mai

Meri Galtion Ko Chuna Kro, Meri Larzishon Ko Gina Kro,

Ye Qadam Qadam Ki Hadod Kya?

Mere Sath Sath Chala Kro! Main Khule Mizaj Ka Shaks Hon,


Muj Se Saaf Saaf Bat Kaha Karo, Ye Mehrbani K Jo Lafz Hain,

Inhe Tum Na Muj Se Kha Karo Kahin Tum Na Ho Jao BE Sakon!

Koi Bad Dua Tumhen Kha Na Le! Ye Jo Khoye Khoye Se Log Hain.

Inhe Dehk Kr Na Hansa Kro Ye Dua Hay Rabb-E-Kareem Se,

Teri Tazgi Ko Khizan Na Ho,

Ye Bahar Tum Se Jala Kre,

Sada Muskurate Raha Karo

Funny SMS Messages - Bakhtawar

''After the Announcement the final result of class, father asked his son.

Father: Beta Tumhara result Kesa Raha?

Son: Abbu, Teacher ne kaha ke Zyada tar bachay fail hain.

Father: Beta Aapka Result kiya Aaya hai?

Son: Abbu, Woh jo Dr uncle hai na unka beta bhi Fail ho gaya hai.

Fathar: Tumhara Result Kiya aaya hai?

Son: Abbu, Woh jo mera Dost hai na jiske Papa Engineer hain na, woh bhi fai ho gaya hai.

Father: Abay Tu bata, Tera result Kiya aaya hai.

Son: Mai kiya Allama ki Aulaad hon jo pass ho jaonga.''

Funny SMS Messages - Ek Muddat Se Meri Maa Nahi Soyi

Larka Larki Molvi k pas ge or bole:

"Jaldi se hamara nikah parho"

Molvi ne nikah parha dia,

Larka bola: "Ap ki fees?

Molvi bola: Apni bivi ki khubsurti k mutabiq pese do"

Larke ne 100 rupe diye

Achanak hawa chali or Larki k moonh se niqab uth gya

Molvi ne dekha to bola:

Baqaya to leta ja bhai. :-)

Love SMS Messages - Love is always

Love is a temporary madness.
It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides.
And when it subsides you have to make a decision.
You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together
that it is inconceivable that you should ever part.
Because this is what love is.
Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement,
it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion.
That is just being in love which any of us can convince ourselves we are.
Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away,
and this is both an art and a fortunate accident.
Your mother and I had it,
we had roots that grew towards each other underground,
and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches
we found that we were one tree and not two.
~ Captian Corelli's Mandolin.

Friendship SMS Messages - "DEAR FRIEND"

when u r sad.........i will try ur tears

when u r scared.........i will confort ur fears

when u r worried........i will give u hope


when u r confused.......i will give u cope

and when u r lost.......and cant see the light

i shall be ur beacon.....shining ever so bright

this is my oath........i pledge tillthe end

why u may ask?........because u r my friend

Funny SMS Messages - Jab barish hoti hai, Tum yaad aate ho.

Once upon a time, Sada and Ada, visited a coal mine to find some diamonds.

Sada takes a right and Ada turns left.


Sada has only a shovel, but Ada had sophisticated diamond mining tools.

Yet, Sada finds a diamond but Ada doesn''t (even after digging for 10 kms) !!!

Why ??

.

.

.

.

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.

.

.

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.

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.

.

.


.

Kyonki...Hira hai Sada ke liye!!!

Friendship SMS Messages - riends r lyk mornings

is raat ki tanhaiyo k
sb rang badal gye hain,
chand nikla hai waise hi
andhere badal gye hain,
jin k bharosey thi khushiyan
vo loog badal gye hain,
manzelein tu ab bhi vohi hai
kuch rasety badal gye hain,
jis pey kya tha bharosa hum ne
vo dost bichar gya hai,
dekhey thay jo kbhi hum ne
vo khwab badal gye hain,
jo baney thay kabhi humsafar
aj wo he mukar gye hain,
is totey hoye dil k sarey
jazbat badl gye hain,
na badley kabhi HUm
na badley kabhi humhare khyalat
BUS
rona hai yahi
KUCH LOOG BADAL GYE HAIn

Funny SMS Messages - Ur Son Is Poor In Studies

I Got Zero Marks in Exam.

So Check the Paper and Tell me I am right Na!

Q.1 What is Formula of Water?

Ans: H,I,J,K,L,M,N,O (H to O).

Q.2 Till When 2nd World War was Fought?

Ans: From page 115 to page 120.

Q.3 Who Was Bhagat Singh?

Ans: Ajay Davegan, Bobby Deol.

Now Tel Me Who is Wrong,

Me or Teacher?:-)

Friendship SMS Messages - Ek achha dos

True friends are rare to find

True friends are always very kind.

True friends are ornaments so beautiful.

True friends always make us cheerful.

True friends are the work of perfection.

True friends give us right direction.

True friends always shine like moon.

True friends are the greatest boon The like friend Rahish

Funny SMS Messages - Zaman Bohat Kharab Hai . .

3 bacho ki ma ne 3 bacho k baap se shadi karli,

hasti khelti jindgi ki barbadi karli.

Din ache ho gaye 3 aur bache ho gaye,

ek din office ki ghanti khadki.

Aage se patni bhadki,

"aap vaha bethe kalam ghasit rahe hain

aur yahan aap k bache aur mere bache milke

hamare bacho ko peet rahe hain!"

Funny SMS Messages - 1 Billi 1 Sheikh K Ghar Se Roti Hoi Nikli.

A lady broke a signal & was presentd in front of judge

LADY: Ur honor plz let me go

i am a school teacher I am getting

late for my class

JUDGE: Ahaa so u r a teacher,

I have waited for this moment all my life,


now write down

"I WILL NEVER GO THROUGH A RED LIGHT"

5000 TIMES AND I WILL LET U GO ;->

Funny SMS Messages - yaaro sab dua karo,

Insan ki POTI ke 4 Rang Hotay Hen

1- Peela (Yelow)


2- Hara (Green)

3- kala (ßlack)

4- kathye (ßrown)

Insani POTI Me Ye Chezein Aksar Dakhna ko Milti Hein

1. Kheery k ßeech

2. Kuti Huwi Mirch

3. Rol Huwe Timatar

4. Dhanya

kabi POTI ko Ghor Se Dakho To Images ßanti Hain

1, Cheel (Eagle)


2, Saanp (Snake)

3, ßhoot (Ghost)

4, Dinasour

etc...

Types Of POTI

1. Patla Dast

2. Sakht

3. Gaarhi

4. Sookhi

5. Jelly


6. Oily

Info Collected ßy

(Wiliam POti)

Funny SMS Messages - Ek Kana Kisi Ladki

''After the Announcement the final result of class, father asked his son.

Father: Beta Tumhara result Kesa Raha?


Son: Abbu, Teacher ne kaha ke Zyada tar bachay fail hain.

Father: Beta Aapka Result kiya Aaya hai?

Son: Abbu, Woh jo Dr uncle hai na unka beta bhi Fail ho gaya hai.

Fathar: Tumhara Result Kiya aaya hai?

Son: Abbu, Woh jo mera Dost hai na jiske Papa Engineer hain na, woh bhi fai ho gaya hai.

Father: Abay Tu bata, Tera result Kiya aaya hai.

Son: Mai kiya Allama ki Aulaad hon jo pass ho jaonga.''

Love SMS Messages - My heart it speaks

Tere IsHQ ne Bakhshi Hai Ye Soghat Musalsal,

Tera zikar Hamesha Teri Baat Musalsal,

Ek Muddat Hoi Tere Baam O dar se Nikle,

Rehti Hai phir B Tujh se Mulaqat Musalsal,

DiL Lagi, DiL ki Lagi Ban jati Hai,

jab Tasawwur Main Guzarti Hai Raat Musalsal,

jab saY dekha zulf e preshan ka Aalam,

UljhaY Howe Rehte Hain Mere Din Raat Musalsal,

Main Muhabbat Main Us Mqaam pe pohncha Hon jahan,

Meri zaat Main Rehti Hai teri zaat Musalsal...

Funny SMS Messages - ''Jab Load Shedding ho Out of Control.

''aaj subeh mujhe chirhion ki awazain kuch ziada he ache leg rehe then,

pool kuch ziada he khobsorat leg rehe the,

fiza b kuch mehki mehki the,

mene dunia se pocha:

aaj quen tujh man esahusun he?


wo boli:

aaj sms perhne vala zinndagi men pehli br nhaia hai.''

Funny SMS Messages - ** Breaking News **

Easy way to kill an ant.

Mix chili powder with sugar & give it to ant.

After having that the ant will go in search

of water somewhere near a water tank.

When the ant reaches the tank,

push it into the tank,

now the ant fully soaked in water,

it wil go to dry himself near fire.


When it reaches near fire,

put a bomb in fire,

it will be injured in the blast.

Then admit the wounded ant in ICU.

Remove oxygen mask & kill it.;-)

Funny SMS Messages - An ECONOMIST

New Student Remix Of Amplifier:

KaAliyan bariyan we paper nu me laawa,


Speed me 220 di likhaan,

Teacher de saamne me nai rukda,

Em a night writer,

Rem0vAan maAr mar paper nu chehk kad da,

Sarey bchey takde we ki hogaya,

Lagda we aj mera paper hogaya,

Un nu me puchda,

Ni paper sada le ja ni jattiye,

Ni dur isey le ja we ariye,

Ni teacher tu meri, meri, Mein tera student dent.

Funny SMS Messages - what isbrm a t h s

DAILY DAWN:

CA PAPER DEC 2009 HAS BEEN LEAKED OUT.

Q) Wat is da capital of France?

ON DEC 2009: Students write PARIS is da capital of France

RESULT DAY: Students FAILED

EXAMINER COMMENT(wid a devil laugh): capital of France is "F".:-D

CONCLUSION: Even if da paper leaks student cannot pass. Hahaha.

Funny SMS Messages - Dil Ki Bato''n Main Aana Acha Lagta Hai

Meri Galtion Ko Chuna Kro, Meri Larzishon Ko Gina Kro,

Ye Qadam Qadam Ki Hadod Kya?

Mere Sath Sath Chala Kro! Main Khule Mizaj Ka Shaks Hon,

Muj Se Saaf Saaf Bat Kaha Karo, Ye Mehrbani K Jo Lafz Hain,

Inhe Tum Na Muj Se Kha Karo Kahin Tum Na Ho Jao BE Sakon!

Koi Bad Dua Tumhen Kha Na Le! Ye Jo Khoye Khoye Se Log Hain.

Inhe Dehk Kr Na Hansa Kro Ye Dua Hay Rabb-E-Kareem Se,

Teri Tazgi Ko Khizan Na Ho,

Ye Bahar Tum Se Jala Kre,

Sada Muskurate Raha Karo

Funny SMS Messages - BOY: Apni beti ki

A Woman Gets On A Bus Wid Her Baby

The Bus Driver Says :

Dats Ugliest Baby I Have Ever Seen

The Woman Goes To The Rear Of


The Bus & Sits Down ,

She Says To A Man Next To Her:

The Driver Just Insulted Me !

The Man Says :

You Go Right Up There And Tell Him Off

Go Ahead I''ll Hold Your Monkey For You ...

Funny SMS Messages - GEO SURVEY REPORT . . . .

GEO SURVEY REPORT . . . .

GEO SURVEY REPORT . . . .

Aaj Kal ''''MACHAR AUR MAKHIYAN'''' Din Raat Dekhe Ja Rahe Hyn

Humare Numainda GEO Ki Tafseelat K Mutabiq Un Ka Kehna Hai

''''Mehangai Ne Kamar Torr Di Hai

Is Liye Over Time Lagana Par Rha Hai''''

GEO MUSHARRAF Sab Ko Kaam Pe Laga Dia . . . ;-

Funny SMS Messages - Patient : What are the chances of my recovering doctor?

OH GAL KARDI MUSKURAI,

ASI SAMJEYA KUDI LINE TE AAYI,

FIR USNE SAADE NUMBER DI MANG PAYI,

ASI V APNI SAARI YAARI USTE LUTAYI,

FIR USNE APNI BEBE SAADE NAL MILAYI,

ASI PURE MOHALLE CH WANDI MITHAYI,

FIR PATA NAHI SADE DIL WICH KI AAYI,


ASI NAAL LE GAYE APNEBHAI,

PATA NAHI VEER NE KI KAHANI PAYI,

YAARO AJ OH KUDI HAI SAADI PARJAI... :(

MORAL OF STORY :

APNI GIRLFRIEND NU APNE BHAI YA KISE V DOST NAAL NA MILAO... ;->

Funny SMS Messages - Give A Person A Fish

Kid- Teacher, Can I Go


To Bathroom ?

Teacher- Yes, But

Only After Reciting The

Alphabates !

Kid- Ok !

"A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,

M,N,O,

Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y,Z !"

Teacher- Where Is "P" ?

Kid- Its Running


Down My Leg !!

Plz Let Me Go To The

Bathroom ... ;->

Funny SMS Messages - 1 love me 2 hate me 3 miss me

Once a man was smoking


in Airport

A gentleman arrive n ask

him: "Ek din mei kitni

cigarette pee lete ho ?"

Man : Why ?

Gentleman : Agar tum ab tak

zndgi me cigarete pe kharch

kiye paise bachaty tou

Samne khara hua plane

tumhara hota ..

Man: Tou kia wo plane aap

ka hy ?

Gentleman: Nhi

Man: Thnkx Sir for ur advice

wo plabe mera hi hy ... =P

Moral :

Don''t try to be over-smart

Sutta Laga k Geo

Funny SMS Messages - Whisky, Beer & Cigarettes Are A Person''s Worst Enemies... .

Clerk ne oFFice fone karke boss se kaha: Sir mai 1 Week tak oFFice nahi aaonga, Meri Bewi taang torr bethi hai..

Boss: (Gusse me) Magar 1 Week tak TUM kiOn nahi aaogEy.?

Clerk: Actualy Sir aAp samjhe nahi, meri Bewi ne jo taang torri hai,

"WOH MERI HAI"

Naughty SMS Messages - Girl To A Tattoo Artist

Kbi kbi dil chahta he k kuch aisa hojae.


Paperz hon mgr result na aye,

Classz hun mgr teacher na aye,

Van mai bethain mgr school na aye,

Picnic pr jaen mgr wo khtam na hone paye,

Gaarri chalaen mgr wo petrol na khaey,

Kabi kabi parhain mgr position pahli aaye,

Haftay me 4 din hon takay Sunday jaldi jaldi aye,

Sub dost treat datay rhein or hamari bari kabi na aaey.

Aur

Light ay magar wapas na jaey.

Kash k sb aisey hi ho jaey.

Ge0 pakistani students . .

Funny SMS Messages - khud kar k ultey kaam mar tujhe pardwayoun gha

How to ask your Boss for a salary increase..?

Dear Bo$$

In thi$ life, we all need $ome thing$ mo$t de $perately. I think you $hould be under $tanding of the need$ of your worker$ who have given $ o much $upport including $weat and $ervice to your company .

I am $ure you will gue $$ what I mean and re$pond $oon . . . ;->

Love SMS Messages - The Lovely Love

I never knew a love

A love that could be sweeter

No matter what my mind says

Your music gives me fever

The moment that we danced

Your arms felt like a cradle

And when you took my hand

I was no longer able

It never felt so right before


I need to be with you much more

I can''t believe this kind of fate

We can runaway...

Is it love?

Funny SMS Messages - Ek premi ne kaha prmika se,

Pathan ko Rastey Main 1 Chirag Mila

Saaf Kia Tou 1 Jin Nikla Aur Kaha K

Wo Us Ki 3 Wishes Puri Karega

Pathan: Hum Ko Aisa Naswaar Do jo

Kbhi Khatam Na Ho

1 Naswar Ka Packet Aaya

Pathan Ne Thori C Naswar Nikali Tou Utni Aur Aa Gayi

Jin: Baqi 2 Wishes

Pathan [Khushi Se] : Aisa 2 Packet Aur Laa Do ... ;-?

Funny SMS Messages - Pehle mera apni girl friend se bat karna bht muskil tha,

Shaadi ke pehle - Hum Aapke Hai Koun? :)

Shaadi ke baad - Barbadi Ka Kaaran :(

Shaadi ke pehle - Yes Boss :)

Shaadi ke baad - Yes Boss :(

Shaadi ke pehle - Mere Sapno Ki Rani :)

Shaadi ke baad - Chutki Ki Amma :(

Shaadi ke pehle - Kabhi Kabhi :)

Shaadi ke baad - If you are lucky :(

Shaadi ke pehle - Aao Pyar Karen :)


Shaadi ke baad - Aur Bhi Kuch Kaam Karen? :(

Shaadi ke pehle - Hum Apke Hain :)

Shaadi he baad - Hum Apke Hai Koun?

Funny SMS Messages - Sharabi knocks d Door of his Home.

Life While Doing M.B.B.S

1sr Yr: Yahoo I''m In

Medical College

2nd Yr: Kahan Phans

Gaya? Help Me

3rd Yd: Severe

Migraine, Sumtymz


Pagalpan b

4th Yr: Aah Soon It''ll

b Over

5th Yr: Finaly It''ll b

Over

House Job: I Did It

Job : I Love Myself

W8 a Min !

Sunthing Is Missing

Ohhh !!! Meri


"JAWANI" ;->

Funny SMS Messages - ''TV on kro abi abi Govt

A Pathan called FM radio & said:

"I have found a wallet wid thousands of currency & a credit card & ID Card of that person it belongs to, his name is Jamshed Khan, House #3, Gulshan e Iqbal, Karachi.

DJ: "so U want to give him back his wallet?

Pathan: Oo khocha nai, I want to dedicate him a song... ;->

Love SMS Messages - Pyaar kamjor dil s

Chalo tumhare pyar par yakeen karte hain

Dil kya yeh jaan tum par qurbaan karte hain

Bus tum mere dil ko dhukana mat


Bus yehi tumse hum faryaad karte hein

Tammana se nahi tanhai se darte hain,

Pyaar se nahi ruswaai se darte hain,

Milne ki to bahut chahat hai,

Par milne ke baad judaai se darte hain

Yaad toh har koi karega jaane ke baad

Sache pyar ka pata chal jaayega waqat aane ke baad

Kaun kitni mohabbat karta hai

Nazar aajayega mar jaane ke baad

Funny SMS Messages - JIN.Admi se

Pathan k ghar mein Billi thi,
Pathan tang aa kar usey kahin door chhor aaya par jab ghar aaya to Billi pehle se hi pohunchi huwi thi.

Pathan phir kahin door chhor aaya Billi phir se ghar pohunch gayi,

Pathan gussey mein usey boht door chhorne gaya aur wahan se wife ko call ki: Billi ghar pohunchi ?

Wife:Haan.

Pathan:Us kameeni se bol k mujhe yahan se lejaye Qk ab mein raasta bhool gaya hun.

Funny SMS Messages - Qayamat k 4 sign

Benazir ko goli lgi,


bkhtawar asfa rone lgi,

rote rote bhok lgi,

khale bilawal mom phli,

mom phli me dana nhi,

zrdari tmhara papa nhi

pnjab wale bche, musharf bhai sache, sache sche jayenge shekh rashid ki dulhan layenge,

conda leza kali, so nkhro wali,

ek nkhra tot gya bush ka mu toot gya.

Friendship SMS Messages - I feel tears

FAKE FRIENDS: dnt worry evrythng vl b alright

REAL FRIENDS:


galti ki ha ab bhugat.hr jaga zalel hi krwae

FAKE FRIENDS:u r lookng dashing

REAL FRIENDS:

kbi dhang k kapre b pehen lia kr,

hamesha malang hi bna raen

FAKE FRIENDS:Ur dress z cool

REAL FRIENDS:Kis se le k pehna ha

FAKE FRIENDS:Its alright i''ll pay

REAL FRIENDS:Tera wallet ghr re gya hoga

tuney mra walet jo dekh lia ha.


ab tje apna kahan nazr ae ga.

Friendship SMS Messages - be careful in selection

Na who farishta ho na farishtey jaisa ho
Mujhey talash hai uski jo merey jaisa ho

Merey khulus ko pehchanta ho bus kafi hai
Who koi bhi ho, kahin bhi ho, kesa bhi ho

Meri khatir marney ka hosla bhi rkhta ho
Agar kabhi rooth jaoon mein us sey to

Muskra key manayee, woh aisa ho
Jo baat karey to woh nibha bhi sakey

Iradon mein woh apney chatanon jaisa ho
Dukhon mein hansney ka hunar janta ho

Ik aisa hamsafar jo samandar kitarah gahrah ho
Us key pyaar ki thandak ho merey liye aisi
Key woh to bilkul aasman key chand jaisa ho

Woh sirf mera ho, jo nigahon mein haya rakhta ho
Umar bhar saath chalney ka azam-e-wafa rakhta ho

Jo khwab deney ko qadir ho meri aankhon ko
Meri mohabbat ko pehchan sakay woh aisa ho