Abbu:nahi dunga
Beta:abbu de do, doodh walay ki or ammi ki ek bat bataon ga
Abbu:yeh lo 5 Rps jaldi batao
Beta:doodh wala ammi ko bol raha tha k abhi tak is mahinay k paise nhi diay kal se doodh nhi milega :D
Moral :
Sirf memon hi memon sy paisy nikalwa sakta hy....?
Once there was a mosquito and a dog,
who loved each other a lot.
1 day the mosquito got excited
& gave a love bite to d dog.
In response d dog also bcame emotional
& bit d mosquito.
Next day mosquito died of rabies
& dog died of malaria.
WHAT A TOUCHIN STORY IS''NT IT?
Aik jurm-e-mohabt ki padaash mein
Omr bhar keliay hum szawaar thay
Maot ka faisla jab kia tha kbhi
hum bhi tyaar thay, wo bhi tyaar thay
Kar skay na koi wadaa wafa
Aik eqraar tha , laakh inkaar thay
Hum marez-e-sahub gham rahay esliay
Jitnay taryaak thay , saray beqar thay
Wo jo bichar kar juda ho gaye
Wo mohabt k jazboon ki mehkaar thay
Bandhan bhi saaray zabt ke phir toot-tay gaye...
Khawab-o-khayal ban gayen yaaron ki mehfilen...
Ek ek kar ke yaar sabhi rooth-tay gaye...
Sab dard dil main bhar liye sukh ki talash main...
Hamdard ban ke log hamain loot-tay gaye...
Milti rahin sazayen hamain pyar ke aiwaz...
Apni hi Khawahishon ka gala ghont-tay gaye...
*Muhbt:Jske Dam Se Restaurants Abad Hain.
*Talib-E-Ilm:Mustqbl Ka Be Rozgar Tabqa.
*Parda:Jse Khawaten Khirki Pe Dalti Hain.
*Kitab:Wqt Zaya Krne Ka Zaria.
*Dil:Bgher Operation K B Ksi Ko Dye Jaskte Hain.
*College: Tafre Gah,
*University: Lover Se Milne Ki Jagah... =P ;->
Husband: Wht''s Dat 4 ?
Wife: I Found A Paper In Ur Pocket, Wid d Name "Jenny" On It
Hsband: I Playd RACE Last Week n "Jenny" Was d Name Of My ''Horse''
Wife: Sory !
Next Day Wife Hit Him Agn
Hsband: Wht''s Dat 4?
Wife: Ur ''Horse'' On d Phone An Hour Ago ... ;->
car driver- "mein iss inaam se apna driving license banwaunga"
pichli seat par baithi uski maa boli- "iski bat ka yakin mat karo.
ye sharab pi kr kuch b bolta hai."
uske papa bole- "muje pata tha ki chori ki car me
hm zyada dur nhi ja payenge."
Tabhi dikki se awaz ayi-
"bhai hmne border par kar lia kya ?.............. "
General:
Quickly bring me my red shirt..
"After Enemyz Defeat"
Soldier:
Sir why d red shirt??
General:
In red shirt if i got shot, my soldiers would''nt see my blood so they wont b discouraged..
Soldier:
Sir 100 enemy tanks are attacking..
General:
Hurry up!
Bring me
My Yellow Trousers.... ;->
There are 3 kind of Men..
Do u know...?
1-The ASIANS-
They hv 1 wife & 1 girlfriend but they love their wife the most.
2-The AMERICANS-
They hv 1 wife & 1 girlfriend but they love their girlfriend the most.
3-The PAKISTANIS-
They hv 1 wife & 4 girlfriends but they love their house-maid the most... ;->
Apne Labon Ko Kyon Siye Baithe Ho
Kya Chhupa Hai Dil Mein Saamne To Laao
Dard Ki Lakiron Ko Mitane Do Gallon Se
Tere Liye Har Lamhe Se Muskuraahte Samet Laaye Hai
Gar Karoge Bharosa Mujh Par Dost
Waada Hai Sada Saath Nibhaunga
Har Aansun Jo Ubhrega Teri Aankon Mein
Teri Ksam Apni Aankhon Mein Sahej Laaunga
Aik jurm-e-mohabt ki padaash mein
Omr bhar keliay hum szawaar thay
Maot ka faisla jab kia tha kbhi
hum bhi tyaar thay, wo bhi tyaar thay
Kar skay na koi wadaa wafa
Aik eqraar tha , laakh inkaar thay
Hum marez-e-sahub gham rahay esliay
Jitnay taryaak thay , saray beqar thay
Wo jo bichar kar juda ho gaye
Wo mohabt k jazboon ki mehkaar thay
Wo dream dream likhti rahi, mei drum drum perhta raha
Wo call me call me likhti rahi, mei kill me kill me perhta raha
Wo date date likhti rahi, mei dot dot perhta raha
Wo meet meet likhti rahi, mei mat mat perhta raha
Wo Love Love likhti rahi, mei leave leave parhta raha
Wo shadi kar k chali gai, main language course karta raha''
MainMatric Mein
Tha Wo Matric Mein
Thi
Main Inter Mein Tha
Wo Inter Mein Thi
Main C.A Mein Aa Gya
Wo B.A Mein Thi
Main C.A Mein Tha
Wo MASTER Mein Thi
Main C.A Mein Tha
Wo PhD Mein Thi
Main C.A Mein Tha
Us Ne Doctorate Kr Lia
Aaj Us i Shaadi Hy Aur
Main C.A Mein Hi Hoon ... ;->
"Ur husband is suffering from a very severe disease. If u don''t do the following, he''ll die.
Each day, fix him healthy breakfast. Be pleasant, & in good mood. Cook tasty dinner for him. Don''t discuss ur problems with him. If u can do this for 1 year, ur husband will be OK."
On the way home, the husband asked:
"What did the Dr. say?
She said:
"Doctor ne jawab de dia hy...." =P =D
When you are blue.....
I''ll try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
When you smile.....
I''ll know you finally got laid.
When you are scared.....
I will rag you about it every chance I get.
When you are worried.....
I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be, and to
quit whining.
When you are confused.....
I will use little words to explain it to your dumb ass.
When you are sick.....
stay away from me until you''re well again. I don''t want whatever you have.
@ Pizza Shop
"7 Dayz Widout Pizza
Makes 1 Weak"
In No-smoking Area
"If V c Smoke, V''ll
Azume U r On Fire
n Take Apropaite
Action"
@ Car Dealership
"D Best Way 2 Get Back
On Ur Feet.
Miss A Car Payment"
@ Maternity Room Door
"Push . Push . Push" ... ;-
JALTA PHIRTA HOON DOPHARON MAI
JANE KIA CHEEZ KHO GAYE MERI
CHUPTA PHIRTA HAI ISHQ DUNYA SE
PEHLTI JA RAHI HAI RUSWAII
AAJ TU WO B KUCH KHAMOSH SA THA
MAI NE B IS SE KOI BAAT NA KI
AIK DUM IS KE HONT CHOOM LIE
YE MUJHE BETHE BETHE KIA SOOJHI
AIK DUM ISKA HATH CHORADIA
JANE KIA BAAT DARMIYAN AYEE
TU JO ITNA UDAAS HAI LATIF
TUJHE KIA HOGAYA BATA TU SAHI
Tu beingha aur mein kana sanam,
ab yahan sey kahan jayen hum,
teri ankhon mein dub jayein hamein,
Ankhein teri sapney merey,dil tera yadein teree,
tera hai kya sab kuch mera jaan meri yadein meri,
Teri ankhon mein ansoon terey aagaye muskuraney laghey phir to hum,
"hAmY" IS D BEST N CUTEST"
Say dis 10 tymz slowly wid ful AQEEDAT!
Ye msg 7 logo ko send kro 1 khush khabri milegi..
Dont Delete dis iz real,
1 larki ne ise delete krdya tha us k affairs uski AMMI ko pta chal gye
1 or larkay ne ise jhoot smjha usy raat k 2bje uske ABBU ne fone pe baat krte hue pakra kr phenti lagaie,
1 or ny name change kr k fwd kr dya
to usy date pr jaty howy kuttay ny kat lia
so plz dnt ignore n fwd it wdout any CHANGE.. =P ;->
Pukara Hai Jo Naam Tumhara,
Pukarne Wala Koi Gair Nahin,
Ek Pyara Sa Anjana Sa Dost Hai Tumhara
main bhool jaoon usay kaisi bat krty ho FARAZ
kabi din nay bi aaghaz kia hay soOraj kay bhghair
Hum"raat k "Sitaray"hain,
"Tanhaiyon"k maray hain,
"Tum"hum ko "Thokra"do Beshak
magar
"Hum"phir bhi "dost"tumhare hain
Copy to clipboard
K Har Kisi k Hath Me Mobile Aa gaya,
JisNe Kabhi Larki Na PataYi Ho''''BABU'''',
Wo Gandu b Date Maar k Aa gaya,
Bari Aag Lagti Hay Us Waqt dimagh Me,
Koi Kahe k Teri Bachi Ka Number Mere Pas Aa gaya,
Ye Ajab zaleel panay Ka Part Hy''''BABU'''',
Pehle 100 Ka Card Aata Tha Ab EasyLoad b Aa gaya,
Ab Poori Raat Sirf Ek Rupay Me Baat,
Saare TharkiYo Ko Ye Package Pasand Agaya;-
Kisi kumzoor lamhe me
Agar me tum se ye keh doon
Mujhe tum se muhabbat hai
Tum ye mat samajh lena
Mein ne sach kaha ho ga
Aisi dilnasheen baatoon ko
Aise dilbar peraye me kehna
Mujhe buchpan se aata hai
Meri aankhein mera chehra
Mera ye besakhta lehja
Ye sab kuch jhoot kehta hai mager
Is jhoot me aik sach bhi hai ke
Mujhe tum se MUHABBAT hai
Jab se begum ne mujhe murgha bana rakha hai,
Main ne nazron ki tarhan sir bhi jhuka rakha hai,
Bartano aaj mere sir pe baraste kion ho ?
Mein ne dho dha k tumhain kitna saja rakha hai,
Roz leti he talashi wo police ki manind,
Pochti he kahan paison ko chupa rakha hai,
Wahi duniya main muqaddar ka sikandar tehra,
Jis ne khud ko yahan shadi se bacha rakha hai,
Pi ja is maar ki talkhi ko bhi has k shohar,
Mar khane mein bhi qudrat ne maza rakha hai..
1. " Science say Gira Arts me Atka"
2." Fail hoty ko Practicals ka Sahara"
3. "Dagree le k Aag me Daal"
4. "3rd Divsion pas Ghar ka na Ghat ka"
5. "Dost wo jo Imtihan me Cheating Karary"
6. " Likhna na Jnay, Nib terhi"
7. "Qadar kho Deta hai Roz ka University jana".''
CULTUS Of My Dreams . . . CITY Of My Eyez . . .
CULTUS Of My Dreams . . .
CITY Of My Eyez . . .
SANTRO Of My Thought . . .
CIVIC Of My Job . . .
MERCEDEZ Of My Love . . .
In Short
"U are Traffic Jam Of My Hert" . . . :->
Little Johnny Was Sitting On A Bench Eating Sweets One After Another.
Man Nearby:
People Who Eat So Many Sweets Dont Live Long.
Johnny:
My Grandpa Died When He Was 106 Years Old.
Man:
Did He Eat Many Sweets?
Johnny:
No, He Always Minded His Own Business
Sab se pehly 1 se 9 tak koi number apney Zahn main rak lain. Phir us main 5 ADD kar phir 2 se MULTIPLY karai phir us ko 10 divid kar dein jo ans aye us ko
Ek khali PAGE
pe lekh dain.
Phir us PAGE ka Jahaz bana k orayain. Aur Enjoy kerein :P
year 1990
A=Yar ye Lite Q Jati hai
B=Pta nhi, shaid Transfrmr Badlty¿hen
year 2010
A=Yar ye Lite kb aye gi
B=Jub Hmary Elaqy ki Jae gi tb Tmhary Elaqy ki Ayegi
year 2014
A=Yar ye Lite ay gi Aaj?
B=Nhi Aaj lahore me hai, rwp/islmbd ki Bari Kal hai
year 2030
A=Suna hai Purane Waqton me Lite hua Krti thi
B=So Ja Lite wite Kuch nhi Hoti, Sub Tera Wehm hai..:
pota apne dada se hanste hue
Pota: Dadaji, Aap Ke Saare Daant Hain,
Lekin Daadi Ji Ke Ek Bhi Nahi, Aisa Kyun?
Dada: Beta Baat Aisi Hai,
Main Doodh Bahut Peeta Tha Aur
Teri Daadi Ganna Bahut Choosti Thi.
Samjhdar Like Kare
Good Friends Are Lives Overlapping.
Good Friends Are Laughter And Tears.
Good Friends Are Emotions So Deep
That The Trust Just Keeps Growing
Kid- Teacher, Can I Go
Teacher- Yes, But
Only After Reciting The
Alphabates !
Kid- Ok !
"A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I,J,K,L,
M,N,O,
Q,R,S,T,U,V,W,X,Y,Z !"
Teacher- Where Is "P" ?
Kid- Its Running
Down My Leg !!
Plz Let Me Go To The
Bathroom ... ;->
General:
Quickly bring me my red shirt..
"After Enemyz Defeat"
Soldier:
Sir why d red shirt??
General:
In red shirt if i got shot, my soldiers would''nt see my blood so they wont b discouraged..
Soldier:
Sir 100 enemy tanks are attacking..
General:
Hurry up!
Bring me
My Yellow Trousers.... ;->
Ye Jo Chappal Main Pehan Kar Aya Hon
Mat Samjho K Isay Chura Kar Laya Hon
Ye Sub Khuda Ki Deen Hai Mere Bhai
.
.
.
ussi k ghar se utha kar laya hon... ;->
ye jo chappal main p
Ye Jo Chappal Main Pehan Kar Aya Hon
Mat Samjho K Isay Chura Kar Laya Hon
Ye Sub Khuda Ki Deen Hai Mere Bhai
.
.
.
ussi k ghar se utha kar laya hon... ;->
Shaadi ke pehle - Agar Tum Na Hote :(
Shaadi ke baad - Agar Tum Na Hote :)
Shaadi ke pehle - Maine Pyar Kiya :)
Shaadi ke baad - Ye Maine Kya Kiya? :(
Shaadi ke pehle - Kuch Kuch Hota Hai :)
Shaadi ke baad - Kuch Nahi Hota Hai :(
Shaadi ke pehle - Dil To Pagal Hai :)
Shaadi ke baad - Dil To Pagal Tha :(
Shaadi ke pehle - Ek Duje Ke Liye :)
Shaadi ke baad - Sirf Bachcho Ke Liye :(
Shaadi ke pehle - Dilwale Dulhaniya Le Jayenge :)
Shaadi ke baad - Baaki Log Sukhi Ho Jayenge :(
Shaadi ke pehle - Chandramukhi :)
Shaadi ke baad - Jwaalamukhi :(
Shaadi ke pehle - Kuwara Baap :)
Shaadi ke baad - Bechara Baap :(
Shaadi ke pehle - Titanic :)
Shaadi ke baad - Mortgage :(
What is BUSINESS ?
Dad: I want u 2 marry a girl of my choice.
Son: No
Dad: The girl is Bill Gate’s daughter.
Son: then Ok.
Dad goes o Bill Gates.
Dad: I want your daughter to marry my son.
Bill Gates: No
Dad: My son is the CEO of the World Bank.
Bill Gates: Than ok
Dad goes 2 the President of the World Bank.
Dad:Appoint my son as the CEO of your bank.
President:No
Dad:He is the son-in-law of Bill Gates.
President: Then OK
That’s business…!!
