Funny SMS Messages - a dil wee hazir

Rabri Devi died and went to heaven (Don''t Laugh).

As she stood in front of yamraj , she saw a huge wall of clocks behind.

She asked, "What are all those clocks?" Yamraj answered, "Those are LieClocks.

Everyone on Earth has a LieClock.Every time you lie, the hands on your clock will move."

"Oh," said Rabri, "Who''s clock is that?"That''s Gautam Buddha''s.

The hands have never moved indicating that he never told a lie.


"And whose clock is that? "That''s Abraham Lincoln''s clock.

The hands have only moved twice, telling us that Abraham only told 2 lies in his entire life."

Rabri asked, "Where''s my Laloo''s clock?"

Laloo"s clock is in my office", replied yamraj, "I''m using it as a ceiling fan.

Funny SMS Messages - I''M ALIVE u can msg me

Lost my HB pencil with a rubber attached.

The pencil costs Rs.3/.

Warid has agreed to give me one paisa if you

forward this SMS(1 paisa per scrap).

If you have heart and want to help a poor child in

need, plz fwd it to atleast 10 friends.

Please don''t neglect.

Otherwise my dad will scold me. If you forward this

then your life will change for ever.

Your dream will come true tonight at 11.55.

If u dont forward, u''ll fail in ur exams

plz... hlp me

Funny SMS Messages - Bunty: Kya Tumhe

Rules ®ulations for college

1) Never make noise in class respect the fact that others are sleeping.

2) Keep the college clean so stay away.

3) Always take books cos u dnt get pillow to help u sleep well.

4) Never be early to class or else no one will notice u.....

*The only mantra U SHOULD believe is "though hard work hasn''t killed anybody but why take a chance".

*Should always copy assignment,lab etc.

Never even spare a thought of doing them on ur own

Friendship SMS Messages - Friendship

" Read Carefully "

Do you Know The Relation between your Two Eyes?

They

Blink Together,

Move Together,

Cry Together,

See Things Together And Sleep Together.

Though They never see each other,

Friendship Should be just like that.

Life is Hell without Friends.

Funny SMS Messages - I WANT TO TELL you ONE THING

BOY : May I hold your hand?

GIRL : No thanks, it isn''t heavy.

GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring??

BOY : Sure, what''s your phone number??

GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever.


BOY : Don''t you ever want to improve??

BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!

GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there??

Funny SMS Messages - Saare gawaahon

When a Guy does Something Wrong...

Girl : You broke my Favorite Lamp !!!
Boy : It was an Accident... I didn't mean to..!!
Girl : I can't believe you did this.
Boy : I'm Sorry.. !! :/ :/ :/

When a Girl does Something Wrong...

Boy : You Lost My Dog??!!!
Girl : It was an Accident... I didn't mean to..!!
Boy : I can't believe you did this.
Girl : I already feel bad about it..!! Stop making me feel Worse..!!
Boy : I'm Sorry.. !! :/ :/ :/

Funny SMS Messages - Sardarji to others:

Ek Pathan job k Liye Form Fill kr Raha Tha,
Form mein eik Option tha k Aap ka Star Kya Hai?

Pathan ki samjh me Nahi Aaya

Usne kisi aur k Form main Dekha.
Us ne Apny star ki Option me Cancer likha huwa Tha.

Pathan ne kuch Socha,
Phir Apny Form Per Bawaseer Likh Dia. :-)

Funny SMS Messages - Bankey Mian Ki Qawali Hy Sab Se Nirali

Bankey Mian Ki Qawali Hy Sab Se Nirali

Bankey Mian Ki Qawali Hy Sab Se Nirali

Koi Sun''ne Ya Na Sun''ne Hum Tou Gaaye Ge Qawali...

Zong! 1st Sep Se Balance Check Karne Per Charge Laga Riaaa Hy

Jazz! Gaon Mei Ghanta Package Per Degree Bant Riaaa Hy

Ufone! Her Hafte Naya Ad Bana Riaaa Hy

Warid Glow! Feel Free Ka Nara Laga Riaaa Hy

Telenor Djuice! Tou Din Aur Rat Ko Ek Bana Rahaaa Hy

Bankey Mian Ki Qawali Hy Sab Se Nirali

Koi Sun''ne Ya Na Sun''ne Hum Tou Gaaye Ge


Qawali... =P ;->

Funny SMS Messages - Five year old girl

Ek Larki Kisi K Saath

Bhaag Gai

Ek Larki Ko Kuch

Ghunday Utha Kr Le

Gaye

Ek Larki Apne

Shohar Se Larne

K Baad Apne Ghar

Aa Gai

Ek Larki Apni Saas k


Haatho''n Zulm Ka

Nishana Bani

El Larki Chhat Se Giri

Aur Usay Kafi Chotai''n Aai

EXPRESS NEWS

Har LARKI Per Nazar ... ;->

Funny SMS Messages - Memon K Ghar Guest Aye

Itni SHIDDAT Se Maine Larki Patane Ki KOSHISH Ki Hai

Ke Har AMA Ne Mujhe Apni BETI Ka HAATH Dene Ki SAAZISH Ki Hai

Kehte Hain Ke Agar Tum Sache DIL Se Larki Patana Chaho

To Puri KAYENAT Tumhare Liye Larki Patane Mein Lag Jati Hai

Hamare Larke Larki Ke Chakkar Mein Bhi FILMO Ki Tarha END Mein Sab Theek Ho Jata Hai

HAPPY ENDINGS

Aur Agar Sab Theek Na Ho To Chakkar Khatam Nahi Hua

Kyunke Uski Choti BEHEN Abhi Baqi Hai Mere DOST . . . . ;->

Funny SMS Messages - Tee Quotes:

Power Of One ...

One tree can start a forest…

One flower can awaken the dream…

One smile begins a friendship…

One laugh will conquer a gloom…

One candle destroys the darkness…

One sunbeam lights a room…

One breath brings life eternal…

One path will lead you home…

One touch can show you care…

One word must start each prayer…

One heart can know what is true…

One life can make the difference…

And that one is

YOU......;->

Love SMS Messages - U'n me forever..

kro tu kis k lye akhir malal uska.

usy nahi tu mujhe bhi nahi khyal uska,

meri wafa ne banaya he bewafa usko,

kisi ada par nahi hai kamal uska,

mere naseeb ki yeh bhi tu khush naseebi hai,

k mujhe ko dekh kar sub pochty hain haal uska,

yehi dua me karo har baras k pehle din,


mere bagher ne guzry koi b saal uska,

mere urooj ko us k naseeb me likh dy,

khuda-e-paak mujhe sounp dy zawaal uska

Funny SMS Messages - Best error message

BOY : May I hold your hand?

GIRL : No thanks, it isn''t heavy.

GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring??

BOY : Sure, what''s your phone number??

GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever.

BOY : Don''t you ever want to improve??

BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!

GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there??

Funny SMS Messages - ca paper dec 2009 has been leaked out

ca paper dec 2009 has been leaked out

DAILY DAWN:

CA PAPER DEC 2009 HAS BEEN LEAKED OUT.

Q) Wat is da capital of France?

ON DEC 2009: Students write PARIS is da capital of France

RESULT DAY: Students FAILED

EXAMINER COMMENT(wid a devil laugh): capital of France is "F".:-D

CONCLUSION: Even if da paper leaks student cannot pass. Hahaha.

Funny SMS Messages - Hitler says,

3 aalsi kamchor mil k khana kha

rhe the,

.

namak kam lga...

.

1 bola "Jo pehle bolega wo namak layega...

.

Sb baithe rahe...

.

Na koi bola, na kisi n khaya,

. 3 din aise hi guzr gye,

tino behosh ho gye...

Logo ne socha ye mar chuke hain..

Jb phle wale ko dafnanay lge to

wo bola "Oye me zinda hu"

Baki dono bole "Chal beta namak le k aa:)

Funny SMS Messages - 1 sabzi wale k ghar

In logon kee samajh nahee aati, Hamesha dohra roop,

kaisay:

Proof#1: lardki lardkey ko chchery to Shararat aur agar lardka chchery to Badmashi.

Proof#2: Agar koi ameer kaam mein apni wife ka haat bataye to "understanding" aur agar gharib bataye to "Jhooroo ka Ghulam"

Uuuuufffffff reeeeeeeeeyyyyyyyy LLLLLooooooggg

Love SMS Messages - RabT_e RooH

apni aghoosh main ik rooz chupa loo mujh ko ,

gham-e-duniya se meri jaan bacha loo mujh ko ,

in hi isharoon me de di ha ijazat maine ,

mangne se na milloo to chura loo mujh ko ,

apne saye se bhi ap to mujh ko dar lagta ha ,

ho jo mumkin to nigahoon me basa lo mujh ko ,

unhe likhna ha ik rooz khat me ye jana ,

main to khud ka bhi nahi apna bna lo mujh ko.

Funny SMS Messages - ''When i open my

Why Pakstanis are easy to identify?

1. Everything cooked in garlic & onion

2. Re-use of gift papers

3. Always arive atleast 1 hour late to a party

4. Chldren have names rhyming

5. Talk for an hour at the gate when leaving somebody''s house

6. Keep leftover food in fridge

7. You live wth your parents even when you are 40 years old

8. Don''t use measure cups when cooking

9. Bedsheets on sofas to keep them away from getting dirty

10. Cover everything with plastic even if its a remote control :D

Love SMS Messages - Muddat se jis ke waaste Dil be qaraar tha....!

Muddat se jis ke waaste Dil be qaraar tha....!

Muddat se jis ke waaste Dil be qaraar tha

Woh laut kar na aaya magar intezaar tha

Jo humsafar tha chorr gaya raah main mujhe

Main phans gayi bhanwar main woh darya ke paar tha

Manzil qareeb aayi to tum door hogaye

Itna to tum batao ke yeh kaisa Pyaar tha

Chilman giradi yeh kis ne dono ke darmiyan

Na woh sakoon se betha na mujh ko qaraar tha

Yeh mukhtasar sa haal hai rukhsat ke waqt ka

Ankhon main aansu aur Dil beqaraar tha

Yeh baat umer bhar samjh na paayi main

Kyun Dil mera us ka talabgaar tha

Funny SMS Messages - ''''KHUD KO KAR KANJOS ITNA!!!!

Once upon a time, Sada and Ada, visited a coal mine to find some diamonds.

Sada takes a right and Ada turns left.

Sada has only a shovel, but Ada had sophisticated diamond mining tools.

Yet, Sada finds a diamond but Ada doesn''t (even after digging for 10 kms) !!!

Why ??

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.


.

.

.

.

.

Kyonki...Hira hai Sada ke liye!!!

Funny SMS Messages - gadha masjid main ghus gia

Lovers with Mobile in Pakistan cities . . .

ISLAMABAD

Hello Janu

chalo aj CHINEESE Restaurant m Dinner Meri traf sy

RAWALPINDI

Hello Janu

Kahan ho Tum ??

Ek Ghantty sy college k Gate py kharra hon

LAHORE


Hello Janu

aj to film ka mood ban rha hy aur wo b Tumhry saath

KARACHI

Hello Janu

what a Fantastic Mosam

Chalo Beach py Jaty hy..

PESHAWAR

Hello Janu

Kahan ho Tum ??

abhi abhi BOMB BLAST huwa hy


Tum khairiyat sy to ho?? ;->

Funny SMS Messages - Cho0se one number;

When I was younger I hated going to weddings ... it seemed that all of my

aunts and the grandmotherly types used to come up to me, poking me in the

ribs and cackling, telling me, ''You''re next.''

They stopped that stuff after I started doing the same thing to them at

funerals..... :d

Break Up SMS Messages - Mat karao intjar

Achcha hai mujhe intjar nahi hai tumhara,

tum to kabhi na aane ke liye gaye ho,

tumhari kuchh yaade hai mere paas...

Sirhane ke niche dabi padi,


dil ke ek kone me,

abki aana to le jana wo sab,

jo bikhra bikhra pada hai tumhare na hone se,

mere jehan se apni yaad,

mere dil ki wo fariyaad,

tumhari kahi hui har ek baat,

tumhare dwara di hui tumhari saugaat,

or aansuo ki dhero katrane,

Friendship SMS Messages - A true friend scold

A friend is like a flower,

a rose to be exact,

Or maybe like a brand new gate

that never comes unlatched.

A friend is like an owl,

both beautiful and wise.

Or perhaps a friend is like a ghost,

whose spirit never dies.


A friend is like a heart that goes

strong until the end.

Where would we be in this world

if we didn''t have a friend.

Funny SMS Messages - Message Of The Year:

A Woman Gets On A Bus With Her Baby.

The Bus Driver Says: Thats The Ugliest Baby

That Ive Ever Seen. Ugh

The Woman Goes To The Rear Of The Bus And Sits Down,

Fuming

She Says To A Man Next To Her

The Driver Just Insulted Me!

The Man Says: You Go Right Up There And Tell Him Off


Go Ahead, Ill Hold Your Monkey For You.

Funny SMS Messages - "HOYE"

5 Signs U Need To Be A Taliban:

1. U Have More Wives Than Teeth

A2. U Own A $5000 Rocket Launcher But Can''t Afford Shoes.

3. U Refine Heroin But Haue A Moral Objection To Beer.

4. U Think Vests Come In 2 Sttyles : Bullet Proof And Suicide.

And Most Significantly !

5. U Wipe Your Arse With A Stonee....

Love SMS Messages - We Have Grown

Pooch Lo Tum Bhi Is Zamane Se,

Pyar Chupta Nahi Chupane Se,

Paas Aate Ho Chhute Ho Baat Karte Ho,

Kabhi Matlab Se Kabhi Bahane Se,

Pyar Dil Me Hai To Lao Zubaan Pe,

Aag Badhti Hai Ye Bujhane Se,

Tumhe Na Paana Shayad Behtar Hai,

Paa Ke Phir Se Tumhe Ganwane Se...

Chalo Ek Dua To Apni Puri Hui,

Mil Liye Apne Ek Deewane Se,

Roye Jaate Ho, Bas Roye Jate Ho,

Kya Hoga Ye Moti Lutaane Se,

Karo Koshish Ki Kurabatein Hi Rahein,

Dooriyan Badh Jaati Hai Badhane Se,

Kya Sunayein Kisiko Raaz-E-Dil,

Dard Bhi Badhta Hai Sunane Se,

Bhool Jao Kar Ke Achha Hai

Ehsaan Rehta Nahi Jatane Se...

Funny SMS Messages - Sardar: Doctor help me

why is fire engine red in colour????

ans: bcoz fire engine has ladder,ladder has steps,

steps r foot long n measured by ruler,

ruler can be king or queen, elizabeth was a queen..

elizabeth is also name of ship,ship floats on sea,

fiahes live in sea,fishes have fins,fins r people from finland,

national flag of finland is red ,

so fire engine is red in colour

Funny SMS Messages - Hi, Doing nothing?

SLEEPING DISEASE ETIOLOGY

CAUSED BY: Lecturer

HOST: Students

REASON: Frequent Classroom Exposure

SYMPTOMS: Frequent falling on the table, Automatic closure of the eyes

CHRONIC FORM: Serious mucous discharge from mouth


PATHOGENIC LESIONS: Reddening of the eyes

PATHOGENISIS: Mild closing of the eyes, Short handwriting, Loss of conciousness

DIAGNOSIS: By adjacent person, Sometimes by thr prof.

TREATMENT: Not yet invented

PREVENTION: Bunk the class :)

Love SMS Messages - ,,DAIRY KA EK PAGE,,

Kaanch Ki Choori

Kitni Sada,
Kitni Pyari,
Kanch Ki Chori Jesi Larki,
...College K Ik Kamry Me Bethi,
Jany Kya Kuch Soch Rahi Thi,
Us Ka Hath Kalai Pr Tha,
Or Who Kch Kch Khofzada Thi,
Ab Kia Hoga???
Mai B Us K Pas Hi Betha,
Us Ko Ghur Sy Dekh Raha Tha,
Mene Us Ka Hath Pakra,
Aur Pyar Sy Pocha,
Kiya Qissa Hy?????
Uski Ankhen Bheeg Gaien,
Aur Wo Dheemi Si Awaz Me Boli..

Dekho..!!!

Chori Toot Gai

Funny SMS Messages - Last Night. . . .

We live in a "COUNTRY"

1) Where Pizza home delivery is faster than Ambulance & Police services.

2) Where rice is Rs. 90/- per kg but SIM almost free

3) Where the shoes R sold in AC showrooms but vegetables R sold @ footpath.

4) Where lemon juices sold wid artificial flavours & dish wash wid real lemon

5) Where our leading class having fake degrees while educated R jobless.

Wat a NATION!

Spread the awareness the change v need,

Wake up PAKISTAN

Friendship SMS Messages - When a Guy does SomethingWrong...

*If You Are In Love:

-Get The Best Of It

-Forget The Bad Things

-Enjoy It 'coz Nothing Lasts Forever

*If You Just Broke Up:

-Never Cry! Remember That You Were Happy

-Never Stay Alone! Your Frinds Are

There


-Hug More People

-Stop Listening To Music! It Only

Make Things Worse.. *If You Are Single 'n Alone:

-Play, Play 'n Play! Noone Can

Blame You

-Enjoy Every Opportunity

-Never Stop Lookin For Someone..!

Funny SMS Messages - Revised Version of TRUTH IS THE BEST POLICY

Doobte hue aadmi ne

Pull par chalte hue aadmi ko

Aawaz lagayi "bachao bachao"

Pull par chalte aadmi ne neeche


Rassi fenki aur kaha aaoo...

Nadi mein dobta hua aadmi

Rassi nahi pakad pa raha tha

Rah rah kar chillaa raha tha

Mein marna nahi chahta

Zindagi badi mehengi hai

Kal hi to meri ek MNC mein naukri lagi hai..

Itna sunte hi pul par chalte

Aadmi ne apni rassi kheench li

Aur bhagte bhagte wo MNC gaya


Usne wahan ke HR ko bataya ki

Abhi abhi ek aadmi doobkar mar gaya hai

Aur is tarah aapki company mein

Ek jagah khali kar gaya hai...

Mein berozgaar hoon muje le lo...

HR boli dost tumne der kar di,

ab se kuch der Pehle humne us aadmi ko lagaya hai Jo usse dhakka de kar

tumse pehle yahan aaya hai !!!

Funny SMS Messages - New Punishment for mobile uSer

A Woman Gets On A Bus Wid Her Baby

The Bus Driver Says :

Dats Ugliest Baby I Have Ever Seen

The Woman Goes To The Rear Of

The Bus & Sits Down ,

She Says To A Man Next To Her:

The Driver Just Insulted Me !

The Man Says :

You Go Right Up There And Tell Him Off

Go Ahead I''ll Hold Your Monkey For You ...

Funny SMS Messages - Priety apne

New Addition To The Periodic Table Of Elements :

Element Name : WOMAN

Symbol : WO

Atomic Weight : DON''T EVEN DARE TO ASK .

Physical Properties : GENERALLY BOILS AT ANY THING & MAY FREEZ ANY TIME METLS WHENEVER TREATED PROPERLY

CHEMICAL PROPERTIES : VERY REACTIVE , HIGHLY UNSTABLE . Possesses Strong Affinity For Gold , Silver , Platinum , Diamond & Precious Stones.

Volatile When Alone

Funny SMS Messages - Ek Larka,Ek Larki AHA

-The sooner the better.
-Jaldi ka kaam Sheitaan ka hota hai.

-Talk of the Devil and the Devil is here.
-Bari lambi umar hai,abhi tumhari baat kar rahay thay.

-Absence makes a heart go fonder.
-Nazar se ojhal ..dil se ojhal

-Fight for your rights.
-Sbar ka phal metha hota hai.

-As wise as an Owl.
-Bewakuf, Ullo ka patha :p:D

Funny SMS Messages - pathan public toilet gya

Life While Doing M.B.B.S

1sr Yr: Yahoo I''m In

Medical College

2nd Yr: Kahan Phans

Gaya? Help Me

3rd Yd: Severe

Migraine, Sumtymz

Pagalpan b

4th Yr: Aah Soon It''ll

b Over

5th Yr: Finaly It''ll b

Over

House Job: I Did It

Job : I Love Myself

W8 a Min !

Sunthing Is Missing

Ohhh !!! Meri

"JAWANI" ;->

Friendship SMS Messages - UN KO TO BHOOL KR

Kch yaade''n hyn un lmho''n ki

Jin lmho''n me hum sath rahe

Khushyo''n se bhare jazbat rahe

Ek umr guzari hy hum ne

Jahan roty huey b hansty thay

Kch kehty thay

Kch sunty thay

Hum roz subha jab milty thay

Tou sab k chehry khilty thay

Pur-lutf wo manzar hota tha


Sab mil kr baate''n kerty thay

Hum socho kitna hansty thay

Wo goonj humary hansny ki,

Ab ek purani yaad bani,

Ye baate''n hyn un lmho''n ki jin lamho''n mein hum saath rahe

_Dedicated 4 All

Skool-Mates_

Funny SMS Messages - meri jan katreena

Man:Janab Main 20 K/M Per Hr Ki Raftaar

Se Ja Raha Tha,

Mgr Phir Bhi Meri Car Ko Taiz Raftaari K

Ilzaam Me Band Kr Dia Gya,

Judge:Is Baat Ka Kya Saboot Hai?


K Tum Sach Kah Rahay Ho?

Man:Janab Is Se Barh Kr Or

Kya Proof Ho Ga K Us Waqt

Main Apni B.V Ko Lenay Susral Ja Raha Tha,

Love SMS Messages - You are like the

REAL BEAUTY

Do not judge by color of eyes

but judge by innocence in the eyes

Do not judge by lipstick worn on the lips

but judge by truth spoken by lips


Do not judge by complexion of hands

but judge by workdone by those hands

Do not judge by golden anklet worn on feet

but judge by the brave steps taken by the feet

Do not judge by height,weigh or any physical part

but judge by purity of heart!

Funny SMS Messages - zinda baap ko bhi dad kehte hain

Three patients in a mental institution prepare for an examination given by the head psychiatrist.

If the patients pass the exam, they will be free to leave the hospital. However, if they fail, the institution will detain them for seven years.

The doctor takes the three patients to the top of a diving board overlooking an empty swimming pool, and asks the first patient to jump.

The first patient jumps head first into the pool and breaks both arms.


Then the second patient jumps and breaks both legs.

The third patient looks over the side and refuses to jump.

"Congratulations! You''re a free man. Just tell me why didn''t you jump?" asked the doctor.

To which the third patient answered, "Well Doc, I can''t swim!"

Funny SMS Messages - English Cricket Team Is A Weird Pack

Uthamam dadadath padham,

.

.

.


madiam padham thuchuk thuchuk,

kanishtam thur thuria padham,

sur suri paranag ghatgum... =P

In sh0rt,

Poooooon... ;->

Uthamam dadadath padham,

.

.

.

madiam padham thuchuk thuchuk,

kanishtam thur thuria padham,

sur suri paranag ghatgum... =P

In sh0rt,

Poooooon... ;->

Funny SMS Messages - ''Heer : Main Tumhare Ishq Main Barbaad Ho Gayi, Ruswa Ho Gayi...

Aata Hy Yaad Humain Double Sawari Ka Zamana,

Wo Apni Bike Ko Chamkana,

Wo Kaminapan Krna,

Wo Coaching K Samne Villi Lagana,

Wo Bachiyan Phansana,

Wo Hasna Hasana,

Wo C-View Jana,

Wo Baot Basin Per Raja Sahab Ka Pan Khana Aur Sutte Lagana,

Wo Logo Ki Hatana,


Wo Tulley Ko Cherh Kar Bike Bhagana

Burns Road Jana,

Wo Roll Point K Roll Khana,

Wo Paise Urana,

Na Wo Din Hain

Na Ratain,

Agar Kuch Hy To Bus Yaadein He Yaadein... ;->

Funny SMS Messages - Ek Janaza Ja Raha Tha

6 reasons to prefer GUNS over WOMEN

1.U can trade an old 45 for a new 22

2.U can admire a friend''s gun & He''ll let u try it

3.Ur Gun stays with u even if u r out of munitions

4.Guns function normal everyday

5.Gun do not mind if U go 2 sleep after u use it

6.MOST IMP:

U can buy a SILENCER for A GUN! =P ;)

Love SMS Messages - ZANDGI TYRA KOI OR KANARA HO GA

Love ... can''t be explained .

love is only felt from deep down , for love one word is not enough , one world is not enough ...

love is everything , love is all the best we can receive , the best that we can give .

Love , it once had a begining , but will never end .